Why you mustn't trust a word this woman says
... and other body language secrets that reveal what people are really thinking
What do you really mean when you purse your lips, cross your legs or raise your eyebrows? Here, body language expert Peter Collett, author of the Book Of Tells, reveals what your body is saying unconsciously with gestures:
LOOKING UP
As Prince Charles was about to say his vows to Diana, he looked upwards. It was a quest for salvation — he was looking to the heavens for help.
Whatever your religious beliefs, if you look up you’re seeking help from above. People with a sense of self-importance also do it, suggesting they’re in contact with the Almighty.
Revealing your feelings: Looking up is an appeal for help, left, while scratching the nose means the person is lying
BLINKING
Blinking rapidly? Then your mind’s working overtime. It’s a sign someone’s worried, excited or even lying as they’re under stress and thinking very rapidly — anything from ‘I must get out of here’ to ‘He’s very attractive’ or ‘I’m going to get found out’.
SCRATCHING NOSE
Do this and you could be lying. When you’re not telling the truth, you instinctively want to cover up the source of the lie — your mouth — so no one can see you’re fibbing. But that’s too obvious, so people disguise it by scratching their nose as it does the same job, but gives your hand an alibi for being over your mouth.
PURSING LIPS
Angry people often purse their lips because it stops them from saying anything they might regret. If you’ve got something to hide, clamping your mouth shut prevents you from speaking — you’re unconsciously thinking: ‘No, I’d better not say anything.’
LIP NIBBLING
The mouth is the biggest giveaway when it comes to showing anxiety. If you want to know if someone is distressed or nervous, look at their mouth.
Lip nibbling, whether biting the lower lip or a corner of the mouth with the upper teeth, prevents someone from speaking, so it’s used by people who want to stop themselves from saying something.
Sign language: Biting the lip expresses anxiety, left, while a head tilt is flirtatious
TILTING HEAD
Called the ‘head cant’ by psychologists, this is often used by a woman to flirt and appear more attractive.
It does three things designed to appeal to a man: it lowers her height; mimics a baby putting its head on its mother’s shoulder; and exposes the neck. As the neck is one of the most vulnerable parts of your body, showing it to someone is a way of saying: ‘I trust you implicitly.’
EAR MASSAGE
When someone’s worried, they reach for their earlobe to comfort themselves. It’s a very convenient, puffy bag full of nerve endings, which therefore has a lot of pleasant sensation.
HAIR FLICKING
This draws attention to a person. It’s also a ‘youth display’ often used by older women to appear more attractive. When we’re young, our hair is naturally flexible with a lot of body, but it loses this over time. So women flick their hair to give it that youthful bounce.
Read the signs: Touching the ear lobe is comforting, left, and hair flicking is attention-seeking
RAISED EYEBROWS
Arch your eyebrows and widen your eyes and you look startled. But raised eyebrows on their own indicates you’re trying to show you’re interested in someone or something.
Prince Charles and Tony Blair both use this to say: ‘I’m not a threat, I’m fascinated by you and I’m not trying to dominate.’ It’s a way of disarming someone.
FURROWED BROWS
Lowering the brows is a dominance gesture used mainly by men, which tells people: ‘I may be looking at you, but I’m in charge.’
LEGS APART
When you’re on a train, you stand with your legs apart so you’re not thrown off balance.
And that’s what you’re saying when you stand like this in other situations: ‘I’m immoveable.’ You’re telling people you won’t change your mind.
SHIFTING WEIGHT
When you want to escape from a conversation, you shift your weight from side to side or back to front.
It often leads to a little dance with the person you’re talking to — you shift, they unconsciously pick up on the signal so they look at their handbag. You read this signal and button your jacket, they reach for their coat. You both leave.
Men also sometimes do this when chatting to a pretty girl to make themselves appear energetic.
True meaning: The pretzel position, left, means a person is trying to make themselves invisible while sitting wide is dominant
THE PRETZEL
The next time you see a comedian, look out for members of the audience sitting like this with their legs crossed and a foot tucked behind their calf.
They’re saying: ‘Yes, I’m happy to be here, but I want to be invisible.’
You’re taking up as little space as possible, showing that you’re hoping not to be noticed.
CROSSED LEGS
Oh dear, if you’re with a really dull person standing in the ‘scissor stance’, as we call it, you’re in for a long night of boredom. It says: ‘I have no intention of moving.’ It’s a very good way of telling whether or not the conversation is going to continue.
SITTING WIDE
If you want to take charge, take up as much space as possible — spread your papers, arms and legs as far as they will go and put your feet into the communal space.
It’s the equivalent of an animal expanding their size in order to threaten and dominate.
Hand signals: Open palms is a friendly gesture, left, but hiding them means you don't want to give anything away
OPEN HANDS
Showing the palms of your hands is a friendly gesture showing that you have peaceful intentions. It indicates acceptance, good intentions and that you’re open to new ideas.
FOOT POINT
I once knew which dog had won Crufts before it was announced because the judge’s foot was pointed in its direction.
The way your foot is facing indicates what you’re thinking. Follow the line of someone’s foot and it will show you what they’re most interested in — if it’s the door, they want to leave.
KNUCKLE DISPLAY
This is the opposite of open hands — it’s self-protective and is actually saying: ‘Be careful, you could get a knuckle sandwich.’
HIDING YOUR HANDS
Hide your hands completely and you have something to conceal — you don’t want them to reveal anything.
Tony Blair used to put his hands in his pockets, but leave his thumbs exposed — that’s partly concealment but, by leaving the thumbs out, it’s also a sign of dominance.
Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1344424/Why-mustnt-trust-word-woman-says--body-language-secrets-reveal-people-really-thinking.html#ixzz1AHDTrs58
No comments:
Post a Comment